but please dont put your life in the hands, of a rock n band.
who'll throw it all away.
good advice kids.
i also add, dont tattoo anyone on your skin.
often for the worse.
burning memoriessomewhere i learned the negative associations are the most powerful thing in the world.burning memories by weaknesses
and in a universe where i didnt know how to leave you behind and no longer be a part of your being,
i used that as my weapon. burning and bruising and stumbling over loved and treasured places,
and almost dying more times than i can recall.
its hard to drink red wine when you try to overdose on caffeine tablets and panadol
and throw up so hard you think you're going to have absolutely nothing left inside you
(so, you'd match how you feel)
making the associations more powerful than anything you were ever capable of.
break, spill, disappear.i spent the better half of 23 years being so tired, shaking in my ow skin, jittering and constantly wanting to escape.break, spill, disappear. by weaknesses
i felt calmer the 4 years i spent sharing your skin. i liked the way you slowed my mind, stopped the shaking and just made everything more still and okay. then you left, and i starting shaking again and i couldn't sit down, i just kept wanting to escape, and no matter how many towns i ran through, or foreign bodies to tried to share i never stopped feeling so confined.
then when i reached the bottom of two bottles of wine, and i left 5 voice mails on your answering machine, i realised why i cant ever find calm without you. i'm trying to escape myself. i'm tired of a place, a body that i hate and loathe because its not with you.
and i'm stuck with it for the rest of my life.
no one ever came.and it hit me somewhere in between me drapingno one ever came. by weaknesses
myself of your grave like the liquid sadness that i felt like
that nothing had really changed.
it was still me yelling at you
with anger and love and you
not saying a word.
evictiongod shut the dooreviction by 0hgravity
shut the door
it all comes streaming
back in like it belongs
like you belong here
in this room
mine once upon a time
but it smells of you and
every item remembers you
and talks to me:
"hey remember when
you lied to her about where
you were so you could stop by
her favorite junk store and buy her
me? Remember how she picked me up
in the aisle and turned me in her hands like she already
owned me and had memories attached to me and you
knew right then and there you had to get me back to her.
you have to laugh at the irony."
it all up
because christmas is over
and your tinsel is everywhere
and I'm cluttered, tangled
falling for you
give this room-- me
a series of
and large defeats
and I am as
as any other
I have gotten
from there to